Posts by Tito



My baby Joshua is fast approaching 2 and he is beginning to really show how independent he is. I remember when he was so tiny he could barely lift his head and I had to do everything for him. Now this young fellow is rejecting meals by telling me: “I don’t want it”. I cook everything he likes and it is still always a battle to get him to settle down and eat.

Anyway, a few days ago, in one of my bids to get Joshua to eat, I had to bribe him. I made a promise to give him something he absolutely LOVES. I promised to take him outside once he finished his food. My son loves to go outside and he probably requests to go outside at least 10 times a day. I was amazed at how quickly he ate his food after I had spent ages begging and cajoling simply because I made him a promise.

By the time he finished eating, baby boy was tired, so he sat down contentedly in the living room playing with his toys. He seemed to forget that Mummy had him made a promise. In that instant I could have gotten away with not keeping my promise because the recipient of the promise was no longer interested and I honestly considered it. But my conscience didn’t let me get away with it. I knew I had to keep my promise to my son whether he asked or not, it was my responsibility to fulfil my part of the deal. So I took him outside as promised and he was so happy.

As we took our walk outside, God reminded me that he is the ultimate promise keeper. He showed me how even a mere human being like myself could be so determined to keep a promise I made to my son. How much more the King of all Kings that is not limited by anything. I was reminded of the verse that says “for Iam watching over My word to accomplish it.” (Jeremiah 1:12). It means it is not my responsibility to keep to the word but God’s. My part is to simply trust him.

God explained to me that it is true I have been disappointed many times by people who refused to keep their promises and that has made me approach his promises with some level of caution and scepticism. Although I know God is able to do anything, I found myself giving him a pass and making excuses for him in case his promises didn’t come through. And that is kind of counterproductive, because how do you have a genuine expectation from someone you don’t trust 100%. Faith can not work if doubt is prevalent.

 “Now faith is the assurance (title deed, confirmation) of things hoped for (divinely guaranteed), and the evidence of things not seen [the conviction of their reality—faith comprehends as fact what cannot be experienced by the physical senses]” (Hebrews 11:1 AMP)

This is why Abraham is considered the Father of our faith because when God made him a promise, he immediately accepted it without considering all the odds against him. As far he was concerned, once God said it then it was a done deal.

“Abraham was first named “father” and then became a father because he dared to trust God to do what only God could do: raise the dead to life, with a word make something out of nothing. When everything was hopeless, Abraham believed anyway, deciding to live not on the basis of what he saw he couldn’t do but on what God said he would do. And so he was made father of a multitude of peoples. God himself said to him, “You’re going to have a big family, Abraham!”

19Abraham didn’t focus on his own impotence and say, “It’s hopeless. This hundred-year-old body could never father a child.” Nor did he survey Sarah’s decades of infertility and give up. He didn’t tiptoe around God’s promise asking cautiously skeptical questions. He plunged into the promise and came up strong, ready for God, sure that God would make good on what he had said. That’s why it is said, “Abraham was declared fit before God by trusting God to set him right.” But it’s not just -=; it’s also us! The same thing gets said about us when we embrace and believe the One who brought Jesus to life when the conditions were equally hopeless. The sacrificed Jesus made us fit for God, set us right with God.” (Romans 4:17-25 msg)

Don’t be like me, don’t be doubtful and sceptical, choose instead to completely trust God at his word, whatever that may be. God will keep his promise. He really will. If a human being like me was so determined to keep my promise to a 2 year old, how much more can we trust our Father. If we continue to approach him with doubts and mistrust then even when he keeps his promises, we will miss them because we are not expectant.

If God has made you a promise then best believe he will keep that promise. This is not just about promises he made about specific issues but every promise in the bible belongs to us and when we choose to believe God and trust him to keep his word then we can truly be recipients of his promises. Start to bless God for his promises, start to speak about them as though they have happened because they will happen.

Bible verses to meditate on:

Isaiah 55:11-12

For just as rain and snow fall from heaven and do not return without watering the earth, making it bud and sprout, and providing seed to sow and food to eat, 11so My word that proceeds from My mouth will not return to Me empty, but it will accomplish what I please, and it will prosper where I send it.


Numbers 23:19
God is not a man, that He should lie, or a son of man, that He should change His mind. Does He speak and not act? Does He promise and not fulfill?


My son Joshua’s favourite word is probably DADDY. Joshua says Daddy as if he invented the word and he is the only one who has a DADDY. He uses the word as he deems fit, changing volume and stress on the word. Sometimes he whispers it, sometimes he says it in a monotone and sometimes he REALLY stresses it: “DADDDDDDDYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY”. He especially does this when he has been repeating the word constantly with no response or when he REALLY needs his Dad to pay attention to him. It does not matter if he can physically see his Dad or not, that does not deter him from calling his name. And he doesn’t only refer to his Dad as “Daddy”, sometimes he calls him “Bez” and other times it is “Babe”. At the end of the day, he knows who is DADDY is and does not hesitate to use his name when necessary.

He calls Daddy when he is sad and he is crying. He calls Daddy when he is having a pretty good time and laughing. He calls Daddy when he has a question. He calls Daddy when he needs something. He calls Daddy to report something Mummy did to him. He calls Daddy on every occasion of His life. He has a lot of confidence and trust in his Daddy. In his eyes, Daddy is larger than life and can do no wrong. At the moment, in my son’s eyes his Daddy is all knowing and all-powerful and perfect.

I have a little secret for Joshua though, something I am going to make it my life’s mission to teach him. And that is the fact that I know someone who is GREATER than his Daddy. I am going to tell him about MY PERFECT Daddy. Not my biological Dad who I love dearly but the DADDY that is above every other Daddy. My Daddy who is the king of all Kings and the Lord of Lords (1 Timonthy 6:15), My Daddy who created Joshua’s Daddy and Joshua as well (Colossians 1:16). My Daddy fixes all my problems when I call on him and I will tell Joshua about my Daddy who has comforted me when my heart was completely broken (Psalm 34:18). My Daddy in whose presence there is fullness of joy (Psalm 16:11). The Daddy who is my shield and my strength (Psalm 28:7), my ever present help in times of need (psalm 46:1). My Daddy who loves me with an unconditional and everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:1). My Daddy who loved me so much that he sought a way to pay for my sins and transgressions in advance by giving up his ONLY BEGOTTEN SON so that I could earn the RIGHT to call him DADDY (Romans 8:17-20).


What a privilege to have a Daddy like mine. The Daddy who never disappoints and who is always with me and has promised me that he will never leave me nor forsake me (Deut 31:6). The one who does not sleep or slumber (Psalm 121:4) (Joshua’s Daddy can’t even compete because I am a witness to him sleeping). My Daddy speaks a word and watches over it until it achieves what he has sent it to do (Jer 1:12). The bible says I was created by the true word of God (James 1:17), which means I am also his word, and so he is watching over me to ensure I achieve all that he created me to do. THAT IS MY DADDY. My Daddy NEVER EVER FAILS and even when I feel like my Daddy is late in answering my call, he shows me over and over and over again that he is actually ALWAYS ON TIME and makes sure EVERYTHING WORKS OUT FOR MY GOOD (Romans 8). That is MY DADDY.

My Daddy is unlimited (Job 36:22-24). He created the heavens and the earth and his workmanship is pretty marvellous and that includes me (Psalm 139:14). THAT IS WHO MY DADDY IS.

Don’t you dare come for me because I will call my DADDY on you and he will send his angels to fight for me and you will regret ever coming against me (2 Kings 6:16). My Daddy is MIGHTY in battle (Psalm 24:8) and even the blacksmith who creates the weapons was created by my Daddy (Isaiah 54:16) so that is who is on my side. The LORD of heavens armies is MY DADDY and he does not play with his most precious possession which is me (Zechariah 2:8).

My Dad is known by many names, some call him ADONAI, others call him EL-SHADDAI. He is also JEHOVAH. He is Jehovah Jireh, Nissi, Shalom and many others. Joshua is not the only one with a Daddy with different names. I call my Dad by his various names as I please because he is MY DADDY.

There is so much I can say about my DADDY as my provider, my protector, my safe place, my healer.. I can go on and on and on AND on….

Just in case you don’t know, we share the same Daddy through Christ and you can boast about your Daddy too. If you want to enjoy the privileges I have because of who my Daddy is and you are not sure how to, then please leave a comment and I can share more with you about my Daddy.

If you know we share the same Daddy then please do me a favour……



The Naughty Corner

Joshua and I got into a fight the other day and I was so upset with him. I honestly can’t remember the details of what he did but I remember being LIVID. I also remember putting him in his naughty corner until he apologised. The apology NEVER came. His Dad told him to say Sorry and he gave him a completely blank stare. He chose his naughty corner over saying sorry and on some level my heart broke.

Eventually it was dinner time and when he got hungry he had the cheek to tell me “Yum Yum”. To be honest I considered the option of letting him starve (I KID I KID) but the mother in me could not even breathe at the thought so I gave him dinner. And after dinner it was bath time. At this point, the incident was a past issue as we had fun through out dinner and after.

As I put him in his tub and we started to bath, we were singing and dancing when my baby stopped, looked at me and said the words: “SORRY” and my heart BURST with joy. I didn’t even realise how much I needed to hear those words but apparently I did.

What then occurred to me is how we are with our Father and Creator. I realised that even though Joshua had been very naughty and I was disappointed, it did not stop me from loving him. I did discipline him but even in the midst of that I was still thinking about his needs. I was still consumed with making sure he ate and took a bath. Whether he apologised or not did not stop me from loving him and being his mother.

A lot of us are stuck with the thought that God holds back from blessing us because we did something wrong. When we get in trouble, we don’t want to run to God because we remember we messed up and expect that he’s pretty pissed off so he won’t help us. We even secretly think God is the one behind our misfortune and that makes us run even further from him.  Even after we confess and ask for forgiveness profusely a part of us think God is still putting us in the naughty corner.

I had the same fears and concerns. I never used to want to ask God for anything because in my mind I didn’t deserve it. I mean after two abortions, I felt I was not worth God’s love and forgiveness. Even when I knew he had forgiven me, I still was scared of future punishment and every time I made mistakes, I was sure that God would punish me in one way or the other. So if I had financial problems I immediately remembered I didn’t give a beggar money and so of course God was punishing me for being stingy. Forget that I gave that same beggar money 3 days before and I only didn’t give because I didn’t have cash. In my mind, God was justified in holding back certain blessings because I had not been an exemplary human being. I was just sure that God would leave me in the naughty corner forever.

“Forty-six years later and I still hadn’t made it out of the naughty corner.”

What I didn’t realise is that nothing can truly separate us from the love of God (Romans 8:31-39) which is why Paul prayed that “may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is.” (Ephesians 3:18 NLT version). The truth is that there is barely anything my son can do that will make me stop loving him. It does not mean that I won’t correct him or discipline him but love would ALWAYS be my motivation so even as I discipline him, I would make sure he eats and he is taken care of. AND I AM ONLY HUMAN.

How much more our heavenly father who loved us so much that he gave his only beloved son for our sake.

God is not the one behind that shame and condemnation that is holding you back from enjoying the blessings he has given so freely to us. He also is not the one punishing you and the reason why things aren’t so great (That is the job of the Devil). He won’t give his son for you and then hold back every other thing from you (Romans 8:32). It is not possible.

Does this mean we should take that love for granted and do whatever we please? NO WAY! But when we do miss our way and do what we want instead of going his way, then we should understand that his discipline is NOT his condemnation and he still loves us beyond our imagination. He still will bless us and give us more than we need because he is our Father and loves us too much to watch us suffer. The only time he sat back and watched his child suffer was when Christ was crucified and he allowed that for your sake and once that was done, it meant we won’t ever have to experience that again.

So please free yourself from the naughty corner, God released you from it and he wants to take care of you and love you as his own. Don’t stay in the corner longer than you ought to.

Enjoy God’s love.

The Journey

My son is now 22 months old and it is that age where he really is not big on being patient or sitting in his car seat. Every time we have to go somewhere, I say a prayer first that Joshua won’t get tired of the ride too soon and start crying which would be a distraction for me.

I was not so lucky today.

10 minutes into a 30 minutes journey, my son starts to cry profusely because he just wasn’t feeling the ride anymore. I kept reassuring him that the ride was nearly over but clearly that fell on deaf ears when he started to demand that he wanted to “COME DOWN”.

Let me just confess now that his crying and constant “come down” requests got to me and I heard myself telling him loudly (read: yelling); “YOU CAN NOT COME DOWN NOW. WE HAVE NOT REACHED OUR DESTINATION. YOU HAVE TO BE MORE PATIENT AND NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU CRY, IT WON’T MAKE US GET TO THE DESTINATION QUICKER”.

As I said those words, I could almost hear the Holy Spirit snicker. The words He said were something like “that is rich coming from you” and I just had to smile.

The truth is that in my relationship with God, I have been my son many times. I have complained profusely about how long some journeys take and I have demanded to get to the destination quicker. I have not cared if it was the right time or the right place, all I have cared about is getting to the destination NOW. And I would find myself crying in frustration because the journey was taking much longer than I expected. I have been so fixated on the destination that the journey frankly was not my cup of tea.

I remember how much I hated being a stay at home mum for over a year because I felt I should be doing MORE. God had led me to leave my job 3 years before so after 4 years of being at home, I felt God should be opening more doors and opportunities. And every time I asked for MORE, I could hear God tell me I was where I was supposed to be and I HATED IT. For a long time, I cried, I complained, I whined but nothing changed because that was part of my journey.

I did not start to appreciate the blessings I had until I stopped focusing on my grand destination and decided to enjoy my journey. The moment I accepted where I was and understood that there was no fast track was when I really started to be at peace in my life. I started to see what a privilege it was/is to enjoy being present for my son and what an incredible blessing it is.

One of the things I do to distract my son when he gets tired is to ask him what he can see from the window. I tell him to look at all the cars. And then I tell him to look at the birds. We sing his favourite songs and we count. I also help him to visualize all the fun things we will do when we get to our destination, we talk about the people we will see, the things we will eat and the games we will play. All of these things help immensely as it forces him to enjoy the journey instead of letting his desperation to reach his destination make him miserable.

I wonder if we can also apply this to our personal lives as we wait for whatever it is we have been waiting for.

  • Enjoy the journey more. Look around you and be grateful for what you see. The daily blessings and the beauty around you. One of my favourite hymns has the words that go “morning by morning, new mercies I see, all I had needed, thy hands have provided” and I choose to enjoy God’s blessings Morning by Morning as I wait.
  • The journey is often just as important as the destination. You are never at one destination for too long and you spend more time on journeys moving to new destinations. (Read stories of Abraham, Isaac, the children of Israel, David).
  • Sing and praise God for where you are. Choose joy and gratitude because no matter how long it takes, you will get to where God has promised you so you might as well enjoy being where you are. (psalm 47:6)
  • Why bother crying? God’s ways are not our ways and his thoughts are not our thoughts either. We often think maybe if we cry and complain, it’ll change something but just as I told my son; “crying won’t get you to your destination quicker so why bother? (Isaiah 55:8)
  • Prepare for the destination: write the vision down and as you wait to see it physically, you can begin to OWN it spiritually. (Habakuk 2:2)

By the way, an hour after we got to our destination, my son had a new request: ‘LET’S GO’. That is how we are too. Even when we get to our destination, we start thinking of the next thing. After being at home for over 4 years, I wrote and published my own book and then I started to ask God “what next’?

You will get to your destination because God is always faithful and just and he alone knows the plans he has for us (Jeremiah 29:11) and it is left to us to trust that those plans are good with an expected end.


I should firstly apologise for being so quiet. I got carried away with seemingly more important things. I thought I was justified because I mean I wrote a whole book and I thought I had to focus on selling on the book as another form of doing what I know I have been called to as a ‘Light-Bearer’.

What I didn’t realise is that the book was an assignment that God gave me as an extension of what I have been called to do and it was not meant to stop me from writing and sharing with you. Not only did I write a book that exposes some of my deepest and darkest secrets but I also carried on a lot personally. Then all of a sudden I realised I was emotionally and spiritually exhausted.

I made a very important decision to just STOP. I decided to take a deep breath, Pause and be still in the presence of God. I shut down my social media, decided not to take on any interviews or speaking roles. I needed to take a break from the ‘noise’ just to be SILENT with God.

I have learnt some very important lessons in the last few weeks:

  • It is okay to PAUSE and go QUIET. We are sometimes so focused on “doing” that we don’t take time out to just BE QUIET. Although God gave me very specific instructions about the book, at some point, I completely took over and stopped asking for his guidance and direction and that is when I started to crumble because I was losing clarity and focus. That was the point I realised I need to BE QUIET. I needed to step away from the noise of the crowd and pay attention to the still small voice of God just like Elisha (I Kings 19:11-13). I needed to shut out the world until the loudest voice I heard was God’s voice and not even mine. Sometimes when you are getting overwhelmed, you should consider drowning out the noise so you can hear the only voice that matters, the voice of God.


  • I have also learnt that when God gives you an assignment, you have to always ensure that he remains at the forefront of it. “You may make your plans, but God directs your actions” (proverbs 16:9). A lot of times, we start the journey with God and then at some point we start to think we know it all and stop relying on him by making our own plans. I remember going on a trip to an unfamiliar place so I chose to use Google maps because I didn’t want to get lost. But at some point, I decided I knew the directions myself so I started to ignore the voice of the navigation. I ended up quite frustrated and in tears when I got completely lost. It is the same with us, we start with God but we forget that doing anything outside of God’s will can become extremely frustrating and if you are unfortunate you can get quite lost.


  • The good thing is that God is still always our very present help (psalm 46). When I stopped using my navigation system and ended up lost, my only solution was to use the navigation system to find my way out of my situation and because I chose to trust it, I ended up at the right destination. This is a computer by the way, so how much more will the Holy Spirit give us the right direction if we get lost and call on him to help us.


  • Trust God: When I decided to shut down and just focus on God, I realised that everything would still be fine. I was so scared. I worried that my books will stop selling, people will stop calling me to speak and all sorts of things but I knew my situation was desperate and that frustration I felt in my spirit was the Holy Spirit getting my attention. I decided I would completely trust God and yield to his call. I realise that I can’t go further without him anyway so I might as well take my restlessness to him. This is my go to verse: “he who believes in him will not be disappointed.” (1 Peter 2:4)

I don’t know what your situation is, but when it feels like the noise of the world is drowning you and the joy you once felt is fading away, then it might be time to just PAUSE and BE STILL. Time to turn to your Father to find the peace only he can give. Time to ask more direction and instruction so that you don’t get lost.

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